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#26 2020-08-31 23:02:26

hhh
Meep!
Registered: 2015-09-17
Posts: 12,171
Website

Re: Quote Of The Day

Donald Fagen on Gaucho, 1980 wrote:

The kid will live and learn as he watches his bridges burn from the point of no return.

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#27 2020-09-06 01:32:05

hhh
Meep!
Registered: 2015-09-17
Posts: 12,171
Website

Re: Quote Of The Day

So at work today the crew is discussing movies. Grumpy Old Men gets mentioned as a favorite and everyone agrees, then I try to be clever by saying "I don't need to watch the movie because I'm living it!", which gets a laugh.

My twenty-year younger coworker, without a pause, says "Well, I'm living Groundhog Day so I think I have you beat."

Needless to say, jaws dropped and howls erupted, that was a good comeback.

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#28 2020-09-21 19:32:48

hhh
Meep!
Registered: 2015-09-17
Posts: 12,171
Website

Re: Quote Of The Day

Cracking up watching a really stupid comedy, Norm McDonald and Artie Lange in 'Dirty Work' (1998)

*love interest* You two are brothers?

*Norm*
Yeah, it's a long story.

*Artie* My dad boned his mom.

*Norm* OK, it's a short story.

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#29 2020-12-01 16:02:37

glittersloth
buena piñata
Registered: 2015-09-30
Posts: 1,381

Re: Quote Of The Day

forensictoxguy wrote:

I just got kicked out of a flat earth facebook group because I asked if the 6 foot social distancing guideline had pushed anyone over the edge yet.

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#30 2020-12-04 09:58:56

brontosaurusrex
Middle Office
Registered: 2015-09-29
Posts: 2,370
Website

Re: Quote Of The Day

hhh wrote:

Step one: Install wiring harness and battery. Step two: Install engine, brakes, transmission, fuel tank and steering. Step 3: Connect brake lines, fuel line and steering and transmission linkages. Start car and use.

Your mileage may vary smile

Last edited by brontosaurusrex (2020-12-04 10:57:11)

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#31 2020-12-04 23:12:41

sleekmason
zoom
Registered: 2018-05-22
Posts: 604
Website

Re: Quote Of The Day

+1 for the above
and,

Thanks for the detailed feedback, but for me this is r/restofthefuckingowl.

had me rolling as well. big_smile

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#32 2020-12-05 00:56:46

hhh
Meep!
Registered: 2015-09-17
Posts: 12,171
Website

Re: Quote Of The Day

^,^^ To be fair, it was simple once I recovered from my brainfart and could think clearly...

https://forums.bunsenlabs.org/viewtopic … 97#p108797

But, yeah, I can be acerbic when frustrated. @PackRat PM'd me with the subject title "rest of the tiger", we had a good chuckle about it.

His response to my apology for not thinking it through is quote-worthy...

PackRat wrote:

We have all been down that $PATH.

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#33 2021-01-15 11:21:31

glittersloth
buena piñata
Registered: 2015-09-30
Posts: 1,381

Re: Quote Of The Day

Could easily go in the Jokes/One-Liners thread, but as the village idiot, I feel that thread is beneath me (*smug face*) so I'm posting here. Don't know who first said it, but it's stayed in my head throughout most of my life.

The first organ a human fetus develops is the anus. We all begin life as tiny little assholes.

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#34 2021-01-16 07:06:13

ohnonot
...again
Registered: 2015-09-29
Posts: 5,554

Re: Quote Of The Day

^ reminds me of one of your previous avatars big_smile

glittersloth wrote:

as the village idiot, I feel that thread is beneath me (*smug face*)

Last edited by ohnonot (2021-07-04 09:25:46)


Give to COVAX! Here or here. (explanation)

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#35 2021-02-18 08:23:04

glittersloth
buena piñata
Registered: 2015-09-30
Posts: 1,381

Re: Quote Of The Day

From the "Overheard on Twitter" section in a newsletter I subscribe to;

@welcomewords wrote:

If a monkey hoarded more bananas than it could eat, while most of the other monkeys starved, scientists would study that monkey to figure out what the heck was wrong with it. When humans do it, we put them on the cover of Forbes.

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#36 2021-02-19 01:37:01

hhh
Meep!
Registered: 2015-09-17
Posts: 12,171
Website

Re: Quote Of The Day

^ According to this article by Forbes, a monkey can do better in the stock market than the professionals...

https://www.forbes.com/sites/rickferri/ … c3cc23630a

I bet they then studied the simulated monkeys who had more bananas, didn't they?

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#37 2021-02-19 05:25:52

tknomanzr
BL Die Hard
From: Around the Bend
Registered: 2015-09-29
Posts: 1,057

Re: Quote Of The Day

^ It's a house of tricks.

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#38 2021-03-14 08:33:55

glittersloth
buena piñata
Registered: 2015-09-30
Posts: 1,381

Re: Quote Of The Day

RIP Murray Walker

Murray Walker wrote:

I don’t make mistakes. I make prophecies which immediately turn out to be wrong.

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#39 2021-03-15 07:02:35

Anaconda
crypto-anarchist
From: Quesnel BC Canada
Registered: 2015-09-29
Posts: 227

Re: Quote Of The Day

glittersloth wrote:

From the "Overheard on Twitter" section in a newsletter I subscribe to;

@welcomewords wrote:

If a monkey hoarded more bananas than it could eat, while most of the other monkeys starved, scientists would study that monkey to figure out what the heck was wrong with it. When humans do it, we put them on the cover of Forbes.

Sloth... that quote should be spray painted on bank buildings in every city on earth.

Last edited by Anaconda (2021-03-15 07:05:02)


“The university is well structured, well tooled, to turn out people with all the sharp edges worn off...." Mario Savio
"Protections for anonymous speech are vital to democratic discourse". Help enforce our right to free and anonymous speech by running a Tor relay.

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#40 2021-03-16 00:37:35

hhh
Meep!
Registered: 2015-09-17
Posts: 12,171
Website

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#41 2021-03-16 17:04:07

glittersloth
buena piñata
Registered: 2015-09-30
Posts: 1,381

Re: Quote Of The Day

If any person behaved like an app – rifled through your address book, fitted a tracking device to your car, obsessively logged what books and TV shows you watched, and wanted to disturb you at any moment of the day or night – you’d throw them out of your house and call the police.

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#42 2021-03-16 19:47:41

misko_2083
Member
Registered: 2016-05-24
Posts: 500

Re: Quote Of The Day

glittersloth wrote:

From the "Overheard on Twitter" section in a newsletter I subscribe to;

@welcomewords wrote:

If a monkey hoarded more bananas than it could eat, while most of the other monkeys starved, scientists would study that monkey to figure out what the heck was wrong with it. When humans do it, we put them on the cover of Forbes.

Човечанство очигледно жели да буде власник планете Земље, а не њен део.
Mankind obviously wants to be the owner of planet Earth, not part of it.


This content is censored by the German government.

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#43 2021-03-17 02:37:56

tknomanzr
BL Die Hard
From: Around the Bend
Registered: 2015-09-29
Posts: 1,057

Re: Quote Of The Day

glittersloth wrote:

If any person behaved like an app – rifled through your address book, fitted a tracking device to your car, obsessively logged what books and TV shows you watched, and wanted to disturb you at any moment of the day or night – you’d throw them out of your house and call the police.

Actually, a lot of people would probably marry them.

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#44 2021-03-17 02:55:26

damo
....moderator....
Registered: 2015-08-20
Posts: 6,701

Re: Quote Of The Day

^ big_smile big_smile

Apps are easier to delete though. No axe and spade are necessary.


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